Leader Of The Pack

The first official episode of Kids Incorporated begins with what appears to be people out on the street working on a set of steps and reading a newspaper in the dark of the night.  In the span of seconds, the lights come up and kids run into The P*lace as our heroes Kids Incorporated are performing a soundcheck.

Well, most of them are.  It appears Renee is sitting at a table chatting up a fella much too old for her.

Mickey then calls her up on the stage so they can begin their first number.  As she joins him with a sardonic “Yes Master!” he inquires as to who she is sitting with.  She tosses off a non-committal “Just met him.” while Gloria announces that he is pretty cute.  Ever the Diva, Mickey asks if the guy is talented before pulling a superstar pose to start the song.

1ST SONG:
JUMP
Mickey/Gloria/band

As the song progresses you can tell that the blond stranger in the audience is NOT impressed with what he is seeing.  There is a guitar solo where it is evident that Mickey has no idea how to play the guitar he is wielding right down to the way he has it strapped across his shoulders.  This will be a long standing theme with the kids and how they “play” instruments in this show.

As the song ends, the blond stranger gets up from the table and takes a picture of the band with what appears to be a “Le Click” camera and the flash stops Mickey in mid song even though you hear his voice is still singing.

At the end of the song the crowd erupts into massive applause and then abruptly leave their seats. Where they are going, I’m not sure.  We don’t have a soda jerk in the series yet.

The band comes off stage patting themselves very hard on the back at how great they are and Mickey reminds them that they have rehearsal later.  What then happens is Mickey spouting off a bunch of orders about who should do certain things to their own personal property (hair, shoes, etc) for the good of the band.  The rest of the band fights back and anarchy ensues. Much to the blond strangers enjoyment.

Shanice and Mario are innocently trying on headbands in God-Knows-Where and hear the fighting.

Mario springs into action and tries to save the band.

After Mario refers to them as the A-Team of Music, Gloria accuses Mickey of being Mr. T.  This analogy really doesn’t make any sense if you actually watched the A-Team…Everyone knows that Hannibal was the leader of that group.

When Mario asks what will happen to the band if they break up, the blond strangers approaches and says they can be a part of his band.  He then grabs the guitar from Mickey and plays it much more convincingly than Mickey ever did, even though there is no amp that it is plugged into.

In case anyone is wondering, I will continue to refer to this dude as the blond stranger because they never once give him a name.

Cut to outside The P*lace where the group minus Mickey is walking with blond stranger (I’m getting tired of typing that so I’m just going to refer to him as BS which is kind of fitting) in front of a van.  He’s singing their praises and telling them if they join him, the won’t have to worry about a thing ever again.  He not so modestly reveals that he is rich and they will not have to want for a single thing.

 

He then walks ahead and basically waits for them to salivate when Renee calls talent into the equation.

Cut to:

SONG TWO
“Heart of Rock n Roll”
BS

BS launches into his song and the others seem rather standoffish.  Gloria even does this weird hip thrust move that has always bothered me.  I’m pretty sure she didn’t know she was on camera when that happened.

So the kids are unimpressed until BS’s valet starts showing all the kids the new outfits and instruments that he has in the van.  It’s practically “stranger danger” time as he is showing all the cool stuff he has in his van.  But the kids fall for it and start dancing and cheering BS on.  The Kid is given a brand new saxophone and he starts wailing away.

Now remember earlier when I mentioned an ongoing theme about not properly playing the instruments.  The Kid has dimples.  I’m pretty sure when you play a saxophone you are supposed to blow the air into it and when that happens your dimples shouldn’t show.  However, I have never played a saxophone and I do not have dimples, so what the heck do I know?

Inside the P*lace, Mickey is being fawned over by some gals and Mario tells him she should come outside and see what is going on.  He does and pretends to work on his bike while observing.

The song finishes and the kids are all for joining this new band except for Gloria who thinks they are rushing it.  She doesn’t like the idea of joining up with someone she barely knows.

BS goes all creepy and tells her they could solve that with a night in his van and Mickey postures up for the first time.  This was the one time I was hoping for some Mickey/Gloria romance in the future but alas it was not meant to be.

Mickey does however, go over and start talking smack about the new guy and suggesting that the group not mix it up with him.

BS takes this as a challenge and a MJ style dance off is done to:

3RD SONG:
Beat It
The Kid

Everyone is found on the steps outside and BS is talking some more bs about how rich he is and how he can get them all tickets to go see Michael Jackson if they just join his band.

The kids decide they really need to talk about this and huddle up while Mickey walks off to contemplate his behavior.

4TH SONG:
Against All Odds
Mickey

 

After his solo, Mickey turns and tells the band he has something to say.  When BS snarks at this, Mickey turns to him and delivers the best line of the episode: “Hey, you keep that up, I’m going to step on your nose.”

Mickey then gives a half assed apology not really apologizing but basically giving his permission to the band to join up with the other guy and then walks away.

The kids head over to BS and tell him that he might have money and talent, but he wasn’t friendly and so they are passing on his offer.  I’m not sure if I would actually refer to Mickey as friendly in this episode either, but that is neither here nor there.  Mickey asks to rejoin the group and they all cheerfully run into the P*lace together.

Obviously miffed at being shined off by Kids Incorporated, BS snaps and tells his chauffeur to “Come On Reilly.”  But Reilly refuses.  He says he fed up with BS’s BS and quits on the spot.

AND WHAT A COINCIDENCE!  There is a HELP WANTED sign in the window of the P*lace!!

CUT TO:

Reilly serving up ice cream and malts while the band performs:

FIFTH SONG:
There’s No Stopping Us
Mickey/Gloria

They start out on the stage and complete the song in the streets.